I know this is my first post in a long time, but I’m finally settled into my new home in Illinois, and I’m loving it. My friends are great, and even though it was the biggest decision of my life, I think it was a good one.
But to the point of my post.
Everyone knows the saying, “RL always comes before the game”. Yeah, understandable, right? Wedding, emergencies, or just plans with friends, those always come first before the game, right? Well, when is the line drawn when it comes to RL before the game? When it is time to say, “The game comes first before RL?”
For instance, when is it time to put a game before the interest of your friends?
I hear stories of people who are in groups where loot is given or defaulted to a friends and such, and yeah, it offends people obviously. But these are people with the mentality that even in the game, “RL before the game”. To a stranger, you’re just a faceless, nameless, nobody in the game, when they have a good IRL buddy or friend who wants the same piece you do.
Granted it’s inexcusable, but don’t we all believe that RL comes before the Game?
What about when it comes to favors?
You’re in a PUG, and a friend you know wants you to come help them or run something with them? Obviously you’re going to leave that PUG and help out your friend… why? Because they’re your friend, and RL comes before the game.
What about money?
We all know there are lowbies and new players who randomly send people tells asking for 5 or 10 gold because they need a little help, but what if a friend asks you for a loan of, oh say, 5000 gold to get thier epic flying? Well, assuming you can afford it, you will obviously loan said friend 5k gold instead of that lowbie the 5 gold because, hey…. guess what…. RL comes before the game.
What about when it comes to raids?
You wanna raid, you wanna kill internet dragons, but you’ve got friends who want to go along with more faceless strangers. Who do you take? The friend who may need a little help, or the faceless stranger who can pull numbers? Oh… hesitant? So is this the line where RL doesn’t come before the game? Interesting… because we’ve always supported RL before the game.
So you take that friend who might not be as good, and maybe you don’t get as far as you want, but hey… you had fun because it was with a friend. You laughed, cracked jokes, and helped out your freind, giving him or her a few pointers on how to improve thier game.
Or, say you take that faceless person, and you blow through the raid, getting bosses down and all these pretty purples… but what about that friend? That friend that you not only abandoned, but offended, and basically told them that they weren’t good enough. Is this really the line where RL doesn’t come before the game? Because you’d rather kill internet dragons and would rather get more shiney pixilated purple epics than keep a healthy friendship in tact with your buddy?
Oh, but they should understand.
Understanding isn’t the point. Sure that friend will smile, and shove it off as no big deal, accept they need improvement and aren’t the best pick, but that still doesn’t excuse the fact that said freind… is still hurt, and offended by your actions. Because said friend wants to improve, and wants to be good enough, and wanted to just play with his or her freind, but said friend is shunned, and cast aside because… they’re just not good enough in game.
How would that affect your relationship out of game?
3 comments
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October 8, 2009 at 12:14 pm
kyrilean
Welcome back! I for one have missed you. In game too!
To answer your question, it’d probably put a big damper on your relationship.
October 8, 2009 at 6:20 pm
Finoria
I’ve been that friend before — the one taken to a raid to be helped out [or “carried,” but I HATE that term] and told how to improve my game. I don’t like being that person, because invariably I get dumped on because my numbers weren’t high enough, or I didn’t move out of the bad stuff, or I pulled something when we weren’t ready … and while most people can smile and shrug it off without a problem, I feel like crap, and I always fear that I’ve made my buddy resent me a little bit.
On the other hand, I don’t mind taking others to raids; WoW might be srs bzns a lot of the time, but it’s always nice to help people out, and I generally don’t resent anyone wanting to learn how to step up their game.
Outside of the game, I think it’d put a damper on things. I know I probably wouldn’t bring WoW up around them anymore. Nice food for thought, though.
October 8, 2009 at 7:14 pm
Ron
If your friend was horrible at kickball, would you pick them before everyone else who was better? There is not really an answer to this as it depends on the person. Some people are offended when their inferior abilities are questioned; others realize it’s just a game and will not take it personally. So to answer your question, the outcome depends on your friend.